journal mi

My Source My Creator My Grace My Saviour My Redeemer My Lord My Father My Sustainer My Essence My Rest My Love and My God!!!!

You cometh You cometh for me I feel you near I sense you strong Waited for years The wait is over My partner comes My own man is finally here Our mission; Exemplary Our words; cast in stone for generations to come In total submission, We surrender ourselves and our union to our God This choice we have made will be heard by many generations ….our process, our birthing and our synergy! I trust you with my dreams I trust you with my future I have chosen to love, help and submit to you My hero, my lord, my crown and my man I accept your leadership I accept your body I accept your weaknesses and strengths May we grow together and the best of love be expressed through us Our children will surely call us BLESSED!!!

Your calmness Your hoarding of words Your ‘perceived’ innocence Everything you say feels genuine Although not to me but to Tarri I admire your approach towards her See that sendless jump of excitement you expressed when she was saved from eviction Tears refused to remain where they belong at the sight of the farewell hug too. Broz, I too gbadun you! Of course I know its surface level admiration But kai!…..I covet something you have even though I can’t tie it to an English word My blood jumps I hope we get to meet on this end of the planet If not, all the best mate!!! ……….your splendid voice is a topic for another day!

Everything flashes back like yesterday Met u at my friend’s church U distributed your fatherly hugs around U had to move in because of the repairs on 3rd mainland Oh, the multiplier effect of poor infrastructure U wanted family evenings together –TV, eating, gist et al But luckily our work wouldn’t let us U shared the hugs evenly – mine & hers Saw the way u looked at her But haba! how can I suspect Mr Deacon Closer to 50 than 45 ‘It can’t be what I’m thinking’ Then she had to travel Leaving the 2 of us alone My only worry was your addiction to gist then .......the reality of the hugs Couldn’t compare with hers anymore Is it the Babcock in me that is so uncomfortable? Ok…….. Then I avoided you and the hugs...... U came & hugged unexpectedly Then started adding interesting pecks Confusion bami immediately Deacon!!!!!!!!!! Is this still brotherly love? U are her uncle’s close friend R u thinking at all???? Or nah my imagination. I avoided seeing u in d morning or when I got back

* Adventure over Inertia * Liquid over Solid * Children over Adults * Casual over Formal * Questions over Answers * Concise over Verbose * Biro over Pencil * Velocity over Slowness * Studs over Blings * God over Man

It’s clear to me now than ever before that the way you live your life is your choice. Even God has given us the power of choice so who is man to tell you; ‘you have to do it like this’ or ‘this is how it’s done’. Illustration: At a certain age you have to begin to paint/fix your nails, your eyebrow has to go, you have to start to carry a big bag that will break your shoulders :), you have to get married, you have to write a professional exam, you have to go for your cousin’s wedding……. …….duh! I don’t have to do anything. I have chosen to live my life deliberately making my choices • I have deliberately chosen the path of simplicity • I have deliberately chosen the places I have to go to • I deliberately choose! The word is I don’t have to do anything!!! (maybe the caveat should be expect you are under 18 :)) 07/09

I knew it wasn’t right. Personal values, societal values and all the works, I didn’t let us grow. We kept it platonic (difficultly so). Our hearts wanted more. Our heads knew better. Only space and time can heal us. I’m utmostly grateful for your THERENESS, Your openness, your romance, your consistency and your maturity. I did it for your clan, for my man for myself & for you. When we meet in future, because  I'm sure we will, We’ll catch up on our phases.  I will miss you sorely.  Still in tears.

Emotion left on her own will depreciate someday While alive and in flames it seems as if you’ll be consumed if you don’t express her or the other party doesn’t react in the desired direction. She can bear many children ranging from flings to crushes to outright obsession and sometimes Love. Emotion on her own is healthy and she keeps the engine of relationships running. The kind we speak of in this note is when she ain’t mutual (or seemingly so). Emotion in this context: a state where your blood literally jumps out of your veins at the mention or sight of anything that concerneth the igniting party. Where you wait by your phone literally praying that a call comes in or you refresh your inbox like a gazillion times expecting an unsent message. Truth is, we have no control over these emotions; we don’t solicit for her birth. She just comes upon us suddenly. The only way out is managing her by putting her where she belongs. Oh yes there are solutions even if

I ain’t of many words…………yet I have decided to blog I pride myself in being ‘Ruth’ & a hopeless romantic……..yet I’ve never been in any serious relationship Need an intense course on relationship management…….yet I have a number of faithful friends Avoid going for parries…..but mine tends to be full I’m never shy or scared but my voice shakes terribly when I address a mass audience I’m God crazy but not church crazy I need some fat but have become addicted to a healthy diet …….bla bla bla!!!!!

The sound of your name ignites fire in my bones How can a mere man like me live with such high standards? In my years on this planet (apart from my Lord Jesus), I have not met any man so great. The anthology of your writings changed my life forever. You placed demands on your life that I haven’t heard of in my existence. Your theme of truth and non-violence, of love and self sacrifice, of common good........ You walked your talk 100%, Oh what height of Integrity! In your imperfections you still tried to remain true to yourself & your God Your focus was on things that mattered on this side of the planet…the essentials…sound principles! I have never wished I met any ‘hero’ like I wish I met you You are truly my Hero! Heard of great men but none like you Oh the power of the inner voice and self sacrifice…. I surely cannot put it better than Dr Martin Luther King Jnr “Gandhi was inevitable. If humanity is to progress, Gandhi is inescapable……We may ignore him at our own risk”

I'm sure thoughts of you have crossed my mind a gazillion times in the last 6 days I wonder why! When i met you i began to have a secret crush on you ( i wish i knew how successful i was at the 'secret' bit) then you fell in love. I managed myself & depreciated my crush back to platonic levels. We have done well as platonics and i have always imagined it to remain at that level. All of a sudden thoughts of you begin to flood my mind It scarces me I'm forced to put my thoughts on paper Logically, I dont want anything exceeding platonic levels because going by head sense, you dont strike me as my soul mate Yet, the thoughts keep coming, i dont know what to do with them. I wonder if thoughts of' 'us' have ever crossed your mind. Trust me, i wouldn't sacrifice our friendship for these temporal feelings of mine Hopefully, my soulmate will show up before any 'damage' is done. 'Jan '09

This principle states that in accepting the strengths of a person we should equally accept the related weaknesses. It indicates that every man that has a strength would also have a weakness that is likely closely related to the strength. A person who is very meticulous and detailed will most likely be petty & 'naggy' One who is easy going, playful and easily forgiving will most likely be carefree and laid back A sanguine sanguine who is usually very charismatic and eloquent may be a bad listener and the list goes on and on. So if you like the sanguine, manage the not-so-perfect listener. If you like the the meticulous and organisation freak, manage the petty nag  If you like the peaceful, nice and easy going person, manage the not soo detailed part.   ...............because its usually a Complete Package.

In my first year here, Jaundice and a Humpty Dumpty experience on the staircase almost sent me back to my maker but 25 years have passed and I’m still standing strong. In 25 years…..   • I have learnt God as my Source and the only being I should place a demand on for joy, fulfilment and well being.  • I have fallen in love with Two words; Love and Live.   • Live:            (1) the expression of your convictions and beliefs.            (2)The act of not selling your soul for acceptance by men who themselves are seeking                        acceptance.   • I have met great people   • I’ve had an intense relationship with Acne  • I realise that virtue isn’t measured by how you treat your friends but how you treat the average man you come across   • Oh the Peace that comes when we focus on things of eternal value, the Rest that comes when we birth God’s will on this planet.  25 years of pain and joy, failure & success, fear & boldness, pessimism & optimism.  25 years of lear

because i live alone  because i'm tired of boring my friends  because i'd always wanted to blog for the love of self expression   welcome to my world!!!